“You’re power has grown weak, brother!” Hades declared, slamming a palm down on the table, “And it has made you soft towards the mortals.”
“Hades, I will not tolerate such a tone from you. Speak again with such disrespect and I shall return you to the Underworld riding a lightning bolt.” Zeus warned gravely, the air around him crackling with barely contained power. “The mortals cannot know we are still among them. Not yet. They are not prepared.”
Poseidon frowned as he contemplated his wine, swirling it in his goblet, “It has been so long, brother. Most of them only regard us as legends and myths. How much longer must we wait?”
“Not much more, I promise you this brothers. Even as we speak, plans have began to turn.” Zeus said, sitting back in his throne. “Soon, war will erupt across the world as never seen before. The mortals will slaughter themselves, leaving nothing but ash and blood in their wake. Then, when they are at their most vulnearable, we will return. We will offer sanctuary and salvation in return for their servitude and worship.”
“And how do you propose this? Surely you won’t trust Ares with this?” Hades scoffed in an unimpressed tone as he crossed his arms.
“No, this will require subtlety and trickery on a level beyond divine, brothers.” Zeus said, choosing his words carefully.
Poseidon groaned as his hand clapped to his forehead, “By the Furies, you don’t mean…?” He hoped he was wrong and that his brother, the most powerful god in creation, hadn’t lost his mind.
Zeus nodded, “I’m afraid so. There is no one else that could pull this off.”
“This is madness.” Hades grumbled, looking even more displeased than he normally does, “And where is he right now?”
“Oh you know, here and there.” A voice piped up. At the end of the table, a man appeared in a puff of smoke. Tall and impossibly thin, with glowing eyes that shifted colors rapidly. He had a thick mane of brown hair that spilled down past his shoulders and a curly beard that framed a wild and crazed smile. His toga was simple and white with a dark green cloak pinned together by a small medallion with the shape of a broken sword on it. On his shoulder, sleeping soundly, a platypus sat.
“Murphian…” Hades drawled in held contempt, his lips slipping back to form a humourless smile, “How nice of you to join us.”
The young god shrugged with a smile, ignoring the feracity of Hade’s hatred for him, “Hey, the Big Z says he’s gotta job for me and who can say no to that, m’Irite?”
“This is nonsense!” Poseidon said, “I mean no offense to you, Murphian, but you are ill equipped to handle such a massive undertaking.”
Murphian fell backwards and a floating chair appeared beneath him, a goblet of wine already in his hand, “Yeah yeah, that’s what you say now. But who’s spent more time with the mortals than any of you gods? Hm? That would be me. Besides, what you need is a little mischief and misfortune on yourside, y’know? I’ve already got these fools falling all over themselves. H-Man, hasn’t business picked up over the last decade?”
Hades sighed in defeat, “Yes. The amount of heroic souls entering my domain as easily tripled in the past few years while the cowards and unworthy have all but slowed to a trickle.” Glowing red eyes glared at the god of misfortune, “But knowing that you’re responsible for the recent spat of combat somehow lessens the joy of it all…”
Another shrug and good-natured smile, “Hey, it’s what I do. So you’re happy and Ares is thrilled…at least I think he is. He’s still angry about that whole Hitler thing before. I told him I could turn the whole thing around with one stupid decision…”
Poseidon leaned forward on the table, “Then I suppose it is you who is responsible for what the mortals have done to my waters?”
The god paused and thought about his words carefully, “Yeah, about that. Can we just chalk that up to small sacrifices? I mean, that’s only small parts here and there. You do own 75% of the world, right?”
Poseidon let out an angry yell and got to his feet. Raising his fists, the sea god moved to pulverize Murphian’s face into a fine runny paste. However, as he stepped forward, his sandle clipped a crack on the floor and sent him tumbling forward and smacking his jaw against the table.
“Ouch.” Murphian said, looking on with mild amusement, “Looked like that hurt.”
Zeus placed a hand on his seething brother’s shoulder before he could strangle the other god, “Peace brother. Soon, all the tragedies that mankind has placed on the world will be undone and we can return to a better time.” Poseidon returned to his chair, rubbing his sore jaw. His temper had left him, but he still stared daggers into Murphians head.
“Very soon, Z. Right now, I’m working on something that’s gonna blow the lid off this place. The mortals won’t even know what hit them.” Murphian gloated as he rubbed his hands together, “It is gonna be FAB-U-LOUS!”
Murphian leaped to his feet, causing the platypus to stir on his shoulder then drift back into slumber. The chair he was sitting on blipped out of existence as the god turned away from the table, “Keep an eye on the coming events, folks. We’re going primetime!” Murphian then exploded into a flock of parrots, laughing raccously as they disappeared into the sky.
“I really hate him.” Hades muttered to himself.
Zeus snorted, “You hate everyone, Hades.”
“True.” The god of the underworld replied with a nod, “But I really hate him.”